On Schedule vs. On Demand

Breastfeeding is one of the things about early motherhood that is definitely about trial and error - you learn what works for you as you go along. Thankfully we haven't encountered any enormous problems with breastfeeding, and after reading countless books and browsing through numerous La Leche League forums (etc) and taking a breastfeeding class prior to Roger's birth, I was prepared for problems. Seriously. They make it seem like problems are the norm. That's not to say problems aren't normal, but the norm? No. But, I digress.

It seems to be almost universally unanimous that the best possible way to breastfeed your baby is "on demand" (i.e. feed them when they're hungry). And honestly, it's a great idea in theory: baby's hungry, feed baby. I feel I'm probably giving myself quite a stigma by admitting that I breastfeed on a schedule, but for both Roger and I, this works quite well.

When Roger was first born, I was feeding him every 2-3 hours just like the books, internet forums, and class told me to do. He actually went closer to 3 hours before he started getting a bit fidgety; perhaps I was able to get away with more lengthy times between feedings because he was a bit heavier at birth? I don't know, but theories abound... By the time he was two months old, he was sleeping through the night, so I stopped waking him up to feed him. They (books, internet, class) said initially you should be feeding baby about 8 - 10 times a day, so now that Roger was sleeping through the night, I figured this meant I had to make up "missed" feedings during the day, so I found myself quite literally force feeding him breast milk about every 2 hours. I thought I was interpreting "hunger cues" like I was supposed to so it was somewhat frustrating that most of our breastfeeding sessions involved a lot of crying (on both our parts) and a great deal of spewing out milk (just Roger).

After much frustration, I abandoned the idea of feeding my baby on demand. It wasn't working for us. He doesn't root. Ever. He did maybe the first couple weeks of his life and every now and again I'll see him do it if I decide to change his diaper before feeding him first thing in the morning. I'm told sucking on his fist is a hunger cue. Well, he sucks on his fist constantly. Minutes after feeding him, he'll have his fist shoved in his mouth. Lip smacking? Yeah, he doesn't do that either. He's generally a happy baby - he cries very little and when he does, it's usually because he's craving some love and cuddles. Besides, it wouldn't be fair (or nice) to Roger if I made crying his hunger cue because it's the only decipherable one.

The only feeding that's NOT scheduled is the first a.m. feeding, which usually takes place between 4 and 5. Then he eats every 3 hours (8:30 is the first scheduled time, then 11:30, 2:30 etc) for however long he wants. He only eats 6 times a day, which you may be shaking your head at, but he's gaining weight well and is otherwise perfectly healthy - in fact, he's even a bit on the large size for a 3-month old. So scheduled feeding it is. Until, of course, he goes through a growth spurt and throws a stick in the spokes of my schedule, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.